The Pause. Taking Time to Take Care

There has been a meme going around that I have myself shared saying that it feels like Mother Earth has sent us to our rooms to think about what we have done. Being in our figurative rooms can be difficult so I thought I'd put together a list of actions that we can take while on this pause.

Be Kind to Yourself
A lot of difficult feelings are coming up, making us feel uncomfortable. The main thing to remember is that it's absolutely OK to allow yourself to feel all your feelings – including the pleasant, the difficult, the uncomfortable, and the ugly. Also notice when you are holding yourself up against some perfectionist ideal that has you feeling like you’re falling short - whether it’s related to job loss/ job insecurity, working from home, homeschooling or whatever challenges have suddenly come into your life. Acknowledge that nothing or no-one is perfect and it's ok to allow yourself a little down-time. Not everything has to be worked out right now. Instead of beating yourself up, try on the perspective of “good is good enough,” you’ll be surprised how often that’s exactly what’s called for. This kindness towards yourself will naturally lead to kindness towards others and there’s never been a more appropriate time for us to all share kindness.

Focus on What’s in Your Control vs. What’s Out of Your Control
When you think about it, even when things are going well and you're not in the midst of a worldwide pandemic
you're never in control, not really.

Now's the time to take stock of what’s in your control versus what’s out of your control so that you can focus on what you can influence while letting go of what you can’t. For example you probably have no control over when you can go shopping for food, or what will be available when you get to the shops, but you can control the decision to do the best you can with what you've got. Other examples of things that are in your control include taking care of yourself, setting boundaries with others and communicating to your loved ones how you feel and not watching the "news". Don't bother yourself with the things you can't control like people ignoring health directives, the fact that your job has paused or closed down and other people's words, actions or thoughts. Notice when you do start to focus on the things that are currently out of your control, take a few deep breaths - right down into your belly and then refocus on what is in your control.

Create Meaningful Social Connection
We're all in the same boat and all need social connection. Social distancing doesn't mean social isolation. For your sake and for your community please do reach out to family, friends, colleagues and/or neighbors via phone, video conference, text, email.

Remember that Community builds Immunity.

If you’re on video conference overload due to working from home or online learning try changing up the start of the meeting or staying online after the meeting ends to allow for some personal interaction. Ask questions about how folks are doing. Maybe ask if anyone can recommend a good book or delicious recipe. Most people want to share what they’re currently experiencing and you'll end up with a much different (and better) video meeting.
Then there's always the good old-fashioned phone call. Without visual distractions, the phone can allow for more vulnerability, more presence and deeper connection. I certainly often notice these benefits in phone sessions with clients. 

Exercise / Go Outside
This is always important, but even more so at the moment. If it’s still allowed in your region, take a neighborhood walk, go skipping around your block or run or bike ride. Releasing the energy pent up inside of you has huge positive affect. Even a few minutes outside in the sunshine (or the rain) barefoot on some grass, sand or dirt will help ground you and connect you to magnificent Mother Earth.

She could do with the connection as well.

And while you need to stay six feet away from folks you come across, try making eye contact and smiling – it will make you both feel good. Last time I checked saying hello is still legal and will lift your spirits. 
If you’re not currently allowed to exercise outside, the internet is awash with online exercise classes. The great thing about them is that no-one can see you mess up the moves and you can do them without a bra or having brushed your teeth. DJs all over the world are playing virtual sets online so now's the time to check them out and dance like no-one is watching. Personally, as the disco-dancer that I am, this has been going on a lot in my place.

Choose Healthy Food
Most of us are still able to go out to purchase food. When doing this, make the decision to buy the best quality ingredients that you can afford. Shop, wherever possible, at local businesses rather than multi-national chain stores. The local businesses will appreciate it and it creates more community. If there is a farmer's market near you, even better. Bring home all your lovely ingredients and try out some new recipes. The "I don't have the time" excuse isn't really valid at the moment.

Continue (or Develop) a Mindfulness Practice
This can be whatever works for you and gets you out of your monkey mind and into your body.
Some ideas include; Yoga, meditation, writing a list of things you are grateful for (focusing on what you have rather than what you have not) journal writing, knitting, prayer, baking, listening to relaxing music or getting your hands dirty while planting a garden or growing something in a pot or a windowsill planter. I love to hang out with my plants - it always lightens my mood and instills a sense of accomplishment and my kitchen-come-home office space also looks fantastic! Personally I also like to chant every evening for 10-20 minutes. I start with lighting a candle, then I say a little prayer to Mother Earth and then I chant until my voice runs out. Chanting has been shown to increase the positive vibrations in our energy fields and increase our vitality. It has been used for centuries by both Eastern and Western "religions" - everyone from Gregorian Monks to Tina Turner has done it. Neuro-scientists and researchers have repeatedly found that chanting helps block the release of stress hormones and increases immune function.
It's also been said that it keeps our muscles and joints flexible!

Here's my prayer to Mother Earth - I cobbled it together from what felt good for me and a chant, that as far as I am aware, is a Lakota chant (although finding the exact details has been difficult) The actual words are unimportant - what is important is the intention and the sound frequencies you create. 

A Prayer for Mother Earth
The earth is our mother, we must take care of her
The earth is our mother, we must take care of her
Hey yunga, ho yunga, hey yung, yung
Hey yunga, ho yunga, hey yung, yung
Her sacred ground, we walk upon
Her sacred air, we breathe it in
Her sacred waters, we drink them in
Her sacred fire, we are cleansed by them
She gives us life
Hey yunga, ho yunga, hey yung, yung
Hey yunga, ho yunga, hey yung, yung
And so it is

These are just a few suggestions from me to you. Please share below what has been working for you. I'd love for my community to come together in this way. I have opened up my practice to online zoom calls for both coaching and hypnosis. Please reach out if you or someone you know could currently benefit from online/video support. 

Be well,
Wilma